Thursday, December 30, 2010


Therapy... in a sick sort of way. This week I have worked my hiney off cleaning and making piles to take to Good Will. You know what? It has felt awesome! My den looks so nice, my living room looks so nice, my kitchen looks so nice and the other rooms... yeah, well, I haven't gotten there yet. Tomorrow on the agenda is the kids closets. It shouldn't take long at all, because they aren't bad, I just want to weed through their clothes.  I know I should box up Jackson and Julianna's clothes for their younger siblings, but ugh. I just want to get rid of it all! LOL. The way I see it is there are 4 years between my boys and will most likely be 4 years between my girls - that's a long time to hang onto clothes. I know I need to though. I am just loving the feeling of dropping off at Good Will. LOL!

Another thing I want to talk about is grocery shopping. Over the course the last month or so, we have gotten into the habit of snacking rather than preparing actual meals. I am finding that my grocery bill is outrageous! I know that the stuff I am buying and the fact that my children are eating me out of house and home are the biggest contributing factors, but come on! My family (hubby included) wont eat a lot of great meals, like meatloaf, chicken and dumplings, beef stew, etc... They are so particular. There has to be a way to lower the grocery costs and prepare decent meals at the same time.  So... can anyone share  tips or recipes that may help?

I am getting control of my household! HAHA! Momma's on a mission! It feels good have Christmas behind us and moving on to a better, cleaner living!

Monday, December 27, 2010


I made the mistake of reading through the old posts on my blog. I read the one from July 22nd, when we were at the airport waiting to start our adventure. I feel like I have been punched in the stomach. Seriously, I feel sick. Just seeing our faces - the excitement, the anticipation... it's too much. I am trying so hard to look to the future, but right now, I can't step out of the past. My heart aches for Willa, for China, for an end to this heart wrenching journey.

I am so sorry that I am always so depressing! I promise that I don't mean to be. It is just therapeutic to vent here. One day, hopefully, one day soon, things will turn around. Jesus will turn my sorrow into joy. I so look forward to that day.

Oh a lighter note - thank you to Donna and Melena for the generous donations! Seriously, thank you guys from the very bottom of my heart. You will never know how much your gift means to me.

Sunday, December 26, 2010


I have been emotional today. Not sure why... silly, I suppose. I think the weather is getting to me. I am a Charleston girl - I am not use to such cold temps. It is depressing, LOL. The older I get, the more I want to move to Florida (like I needed another reason to want to move there! HAHA!).

We had a really nice Christmas. My littles were so sweet. The joy on their little faces was the best! They were just so sweet and appreciative of everything.  I love to see Christmas through their eyes. We have really gone back and forth about whether or not we wanted to spill the beans about Santa. I had been feeling guilty for "lying" to them. But, after yesterday morning seeing how excited they were, I am glad we didn't tell them. There is just something about the excitement of Santa. Ya know? I believed in Santa, and I turned out ok (no comments). For now, we are going to enjoy the "magic" that it is... Of course we talk a lot about Jesus and why we celebrate Christmas. We had a candlelight service today at church and had the Lord's Supper, and it was a perfect conclusion to the holiday. It was so sweet to have Julianna participate for the first time. It was all around a wonderful Christ filled weekend.

Of course, with the celebration of Christmas comes the longing in my heart for my other little girl that is so very far away. It has been hard for me this year. I guess because last year, I just kept thinking "next Christmas Willa will be home!", and here we are and there she is... It is hard. Surely next Christmas, surely.

Oh my gosh! Speaking of Willa, I never told you guys our update!! Brad and I had a talk about when and how a couple of weeks ago. As you remember, Brad said he really wanted to wait until we had saved $6500 before moving forward with matching. Well, we currently have $2000.00 and with all of our issues lately, $6500.00 felt like a lifetime away! Anyway, he gave me the go ahead to get the ball rolling now! So, I called our social worker and had a talk with her. Then I called our family coordinator and have a conversation with her too. This was last week. The special needs list came out on Monday and we asked to be considered for a match! Unfortnately, Willa wasn't on it this time. I have complete peace about that though. I really do. I know when God is ready, He will make her known to us. I am ready! So, we are on to the January list! Maybe I will get a special birthday present!

Needless to say, we are very short on the money needed. We are just placing our trust in Jesus. He provided before, and we are trusting him still. We need $13,000 if I travel completely alone. We are praying that I don't have to. I know that in a perfect world, my husband could travel with me. Unfortunately, that is just not an option unless a whole lot of money just appears. We at least hope that Anna can travel with me again. If she travels, we will need $16,000.  Gosh, seeing that in print makes me feel nauseous. We applied for a grant, but we received a letter on Christmas Eve saying we didn't get it.  We just have to trust. We have no choice. We do have a Tastefully Simple fundraiser coming up, so that gives me something to look forward too. Plus we are still selling the Show Hope T-shirts. At this time, we only have the black tree tee available. I have an order for one, 23 more to go. I am thinking about just going ahead and ordering them and praying I can sell them.

Anyway, so that is our update! Sorry it was so long! I will try to be better.

I hope everyone had a Merry Christ -Filled Christmas!

Edited to add our Christmas Eve Photo:

Monday, December 13, 2010


So remember last Monday I posted about spiritual warfare and how I felt we were under attack? Um yeah. So let me give you the run down of my week:

* I got sick, started running a fever.
* We went for our adoption physicals including having blood work done. Well, they forgot (even though I told them as they were drawing it) to do the HIV and Hepatitis test on both of us. So we had to go back and have more blood work done.
*Went to Walmart to get two money orders to get our SBI clearances done. They printed one money order, and the machine broke. I had to have two.
*Got into a senseless argument with my mom.
*Julianna got sick with what I had.
*Jameson got sick, vomiting.
*Got the bill for Brad's root canals - it's $400.00 more than we thought.
*Our dryer broke.
*Jackson almost flooded our bathroom.
*Jackson did not turn off the shower, so when I turned on the water for Julianna's bath, I got drenched. So now, I am soaking wet and so are the rugs. Keep in mind my dryer is broken.
*Brad gets an oil change and finds out he needs two new tires.
*It snows and we can't have church. So the kids do not get to do their Christmas musical that my parents drove over 4 hours to see.
*My parents had to leave early because of the snow. So our Christmas visit was cut short.

I think that's it for now. Hopefully, for a while. Isn't that crazy? I mean COME ON. I am mostly just concerned about the financial aspect of it all. It worries me. What does this mean for our adoption?  We are trying so hard to save money, but every time we get a little bit saved, something big happens. We do still have the money that was gifted to us, so at least there is money to pay for our homestudy update and stuff, and I guess for now, that is all that matters.

Sorry to be so whiny. I don't mean to be. In the chaos, there have been many blessings too. When we went to get fingerprinted for the SBI clearances, the lady didn't charge us. It would have been $24. So that was nice. My stepdad gave us $500 for Christmas, so that was awesome! We had an awesome friend come over today to pick up our dryer to drop it off for us at the repair place - we couldn't have done it without him (nevermind his truck got stuck in our yard and it took him and Brad pushing and me gunning it to get it up the driveway! LOL. At least it provided a little comic relief!). So even though it seems like our world is falling apart around us, I realize there is still so so so much to be thankful for.  The timing of all of our "events" was a blessing in and of itself. So, I am thankful for that.

I am just ready for a break. Something warm and tropical would be nice.

Monday, December 6, 2010


A couple of months ago I read this blog about spiritual warfare. I know that talking about spiritual warfare kind of creeps people out. In fact, there have lots of times when I have mentioned it, people look at me like I am crazy. It's just not something people talk about freely. Well, you know me... boat rocker that I am... I am going to talk about it. 

Anyway, so I read this blogpost at  Its Almost Naptime a while ago, and it really gave me something to think about. What exactly does the bible say about spiritual attacks?

Ephesians 6:10-12: 10 A final word: Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. 12 For wetare not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.

We also know that Jesus himself had "run ins" with Satan. So while it isn't fun to talk about it, or even think about it, we need to be aware and even prepared to handle times of spiritual attack in our lives.  Let me give you a little run down of our week. Actually it's just been a few days. Anyway, here goes:

* A "critter" got into our chimney and scared the daylights out of me. I really thought I was going to          have to call a pest control service. It finally went away.

* It rained in our den. Seriously, it was about 9 PM the other night and it started raining in our den. My husband had to get on the roof in the storm and wind to see what was going on.  Turns out, the roof at the chimney was messed up.  

*My hubby got an excruciating tooth ache on Thursday. At first, we thought it would pass. The tooth looked fine. It didn't pass. We called the doctor on Friday. He told him he had to wait until Monday. Bless his heart, he had the most miserable weekend ever. He didn't sleep. He couldn't eat. He could hardly function. 

*Monday comes and he goes to the dentist. Only, the dentist can't help him. He sends him to a another doctor an hour away. I had to drive him, he was in so much pain. It was awful.

*We get to the doctor where he had two emergency root canals. Two root canals + three crowns= $5000.00. Our insurance covers $1500.00. 

*Our couch broke. I mean like really broke. You can't sit on the middle cushion.


*My van is doing a weird thing.

So that is all of the major stuff. For now. It's funny how there are seasons like this. Do I believe we are under spiritual attack? You better believe I do. Will we get through? Oh yeah... 

How do we protect ourselves from a spiritual attack? Well, Ephesians 6:13-18 says:

13 Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. 14 Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. 15 For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared.t16 In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil.t 17 Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.18 Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.

So, there you have it. We will do our best to stand up to the enemy. What doesn't kill us makes up stronger, right? LOL. I look back over the last 5 months and wonder how we have survived at all. It could only be Jesus. I know when all of the trying stuff passes, we will be better for it. I will still Glorify Him no matter what. I know that I may not ever understand this side of Heaven, but I don't need to. He alone is reason for JOY!

Friday, December 3, 2010


Provence Holiday 2010 Holiday 5x7 folded card
Get custom holiday cards online at
View the entire collection of cards.

This was our Christmas card last year. I was thinking about our cards this year, and that leads me to  a question. What do people really think about photo cards? I am really curious. Should it be reserved for family?

So share your thoughts. Then send me your address, so I can send you my photo card this year. LOL!

Thursday, December 2, 2010


This morning I was talking to Julianna about the Book of Life. I was telling her that my name, daddy's name, Jackson's name and anyone that is a Christian has their name written in His book. I went on to tell her that if your name is in the Book, nothing can take it out and it seals your place in Heaven. She started crying! I asked her if she would like her name written in Jesus' book and she said yes! I told her that she would have to say a prayer to Jesus asking Him to come into her heart. She said ok! She climbed up into my lap, and repeated the prayer after me... Jesus, I know that I am a sinner. I know that you died on the cross for my sins. I love you. I want you to be my Savior. Please come into my heart. Thank you Jesus for dying for me. Amen. 

My little girl is SAVED! Praise Jesus! Praise Jesus that Julianna Brooke's name is written in the Book of Life!

I have so much Joy knowing my little one will be with me for all eternity. I am so excited about the things He will do in her life. She has such a heart already. She cares for the orphan and the less fortunate. She gave 10% of her Christmas money in church on Sunday to help buy bibles to pass out to those that do not have any. She wants to adopt her children. She wants to help the people in India that do not know Jesus. Missions is a part of who she is. I can't wait to see the seed in her little heart growing for Jesus. 

This is true Joy. What a wonderful Christmas gift to us!! 

Can I ask - what about you? Do you have Joy and Peace in your heart? Jesus has His arms stretched out to you today. He wants to embrace you and fill you with a Peace and Joy that only comes from Him. He wants to spend eternity with YOU. He died so that you may live. He would have died if only for you. What are you doing for Him today? Seek Him. When you seek Him with your whole heart, you will find Him. He's there and He's waiting. Have faith like a child. Your life will be forever changed.