Saturday, May 15, 2010

EMOTIONAL

I am not sure why, but I am feeling super emotional tonight. I think the adoption roller coaster is getting the best of me. I feel like I am spinning wheels - like I am desperately running to Willa but something has me lifted a foot off the ground and I am not going anywhere.

Originally, our agency said mid-late June travel. It appears we will get our travel approval in June, but the American Consulate in Guangzhou is way behind on available appointments. They have a back log at the moment, that I don't see any hope of them working through before we get there. In the grand scheme of things, it will only delay travel a couple of weeks, but that is a couple of weeks without Willa.

Another thing that is weighing heavy on my mind is the finances. We are still about $11,000 short. Jesus has moved mountains and provided in so many ways. I am trying to have faith that He will continue to do so. It just feels so overwhelming. What if we finally get travel approval and we don't have the money to go? That thought literally makes me feel like I may vomit.

I am sorry to be so ... depressing. Just having a little pity party, I suppose. I'll get over it. I just have a list of things I am worrying about. I so look forward to like - August.

3 comments:

From all of us with love said...

praying for a peace. I am sorry for the financial situation. Have you tried for a no interest loan that you repay when you get your tax refund? I hear that the irs actually refunds the credit if you have no tax liability (which is new in 2010). Continuing to pray for you and your family
Lisa

China Dreams said...

It's okay. Who better to understand these emotions than those of us in the adoption community? As hard as the wait is, it also provides more time for raising/saving $, so there is an upside to it as well.

Tara Anderson said...

I wish I were closer...we could have a pity party together. It's been 11 days and still no revised physician's letter...which means 11 more days of waiting for PA. When stuff like this goes down I'm SO thankful that I've got a community here in my computer that understands. Know that I'm praying with you and FOR you in these final weeks of the adoption process. I look forward to seeing God do BIG things on your behalf!!! Love you!!!